NEW YORKER REJECT #1

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Mr Tilley regrets … the following submission fell short of our standards.

A doggie and a bone – please! – the oldest cliché in the book! The artist no doubt thought he was au courant by presenting this obvious wish fulfillment via the latest technology. The concept left us cold. Besides, the META was too picayune to be readily legible.

However, we incidentally must applaud his slap-dash sketch of the animal. It couldn’t have taken more than ten minutes to render. Now that has what we most treasure around here — sprezzatura.

NEW YORKER CARTOON REJECTS

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Mr Tilley regrets..

….that we were unable to use these cartoons in our fine publication. They fell short, one way or another, of our nonpareil standards. After all, we are dealing with an overwhelming volume of cartoon submissions; and one can hardly be expected to run every scrap from hoardes of no-talent aspirants.

However, we may on occasion graciously vouchsafe our invaluable critique of an eighty-sixed opus posted here by this soi disant artist. Like they say in down-market eateries, ”enjoy!”

Stay tuned.

THINKING OF ART

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Some people have noticed my enhanced logo image on this website. Originally it contained my dragon motor scooter by itself — lovely to my way of thinking, That is, until the lady showed up in a painting by Georges Massias, commissioned around 1897 by the Gladiator bicycle company.

She is holding onto a Gladiator bicycle for a flight through the heavens. Why should she not hold onto my Dragon Vespa and take IT for a flight through the heavens? The pose, identical. Her flaming hair and soft radiant flesh harmonize beautifully with the scooter’s green and gold metal body.

Done deal. A new dimension has been added.

Unfortunately I can’t find out anything about the artist Georges Massias. He apparently is as obscure as Adrian Ruyle.

THINKING OF ART

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Wayback Portraiture

Yesterday it was suggested I paint nudes as they might have been 20 years earlier. This may not be as far out as it may seem. I am sure Lucien Freud’s models would welcome it. ( The artist must have his little joke )

My friend the stripper Tempest Storm kept her figure, and performed well into her 70’s. In her performances she successfully de-emphasized`any minor wrinkles and the ineluctable effects of gravity.

Tempest Storm

This is my 4’ x 8’ portrait of Tempest, painted for the Mitchell Brothers establishment, back in the day. In her performances years later, you would hardly notice a difference.

Without giving away any secrets, I could adopt some of her mojo while painting what was before me. Like a techie applying a filter to alter a photograph, I would apply a ”Tempest filter” as i worked.

Say, maybe I’m in business! To get started with a client list, I should perhaps ask Lucien Freud for referrals!